Wednesday, December 23, 2009
I'm sorry for late updates because I've either been busy or I just don't quite feel like blogging at all. Well, my week has been pretty good.
Got to know my LEADS friends quite well and it's just our 4th week studying and working together. This is probably one of the first rare times getting to know people so quickly. We went to celebrate Reuben's birthday the other day. Blindfolded him and some of them led him all the way from church office to Dhoby Ghaut. It was hilarious, especially with his "crown of shame" as he describes it. It's a board that declares it's his birthday and at the back "Give me a kiss". Thanks to ym's creativity. (= Then this group of guys at Cathay went, "Hey zachary! Your kind leh. Give him a kiss!" which reminded me of Lewis and gang when they used to keep fooling around. Haha. I personally feel that I took quite a while to open up to my friends though. This two weeks were better. Just somehow, I can't be myself so easily in a different environment. Sometimes I'm quite amazed by how some friends can be so adaptable. But I've grown to accept that we all have different characters and it's really alright.
Christmas party with cell was great. We're all splitting/multiplying next year and it takes quite a while for me to reconcile with the facts. We invited our future cell leaders, which I thought was really a nice thing to do. Sophia's and Joyce's friends came along too. (= Oh anyway I'm glad that my second attempt at making sushi turned out quite okay. Wooh! Cell evaluation was good. Maybe because I love to share and hear from others too. I think we'd really miss each other.
Cycling with evelyn and rach was great and we covered quite a long distance! Feel the sense of accomplishment but I don't think I'd touch the bike for a few months. It was so tiring! Hehe. Thanks evelyn for the treat! I'm really glad to meet up with you girls and talk about some pretty deep issues. (=
Monday, December 07, 2009
I can't believe I'm missing prom. )= It's okay, I'll invest the money on other things.
2 simple reminders:
-We can never try to feel bad/repay for every wrong thing we've done.
-And precisely because it's too much for us to bear, Jesus came to take the weight of our guilt!
Life was never designed to be bitter.
Good week but rather tiring. I'm praying to be more observant and to gain more insight on things, knowing that two months will fly by quickly. Attachment at Youth Office has helped me to overcome my fear of phone calls. Haha!
Oh but I'm pretty sad that I missed out on clique's gathering and prom. Two good times to catch up with old friends. Hope we can meet up real soon again. (:
Thursday, December 03, 2009
"When I go down the mountains, and get back to my life,
I won't settle for ordinary things"
-Show Me Your Glory by Third Day (of course (;)This part of the lyrics really speaks for me even as Youth camp is over. Just want to really thank God for being with us, which we felt very strongly during camp. I agree that the second night was awesome, but I would really say that God is with us all the time! I guess camps really help as a form of retreat from whatever we're doing.. It's a good draw-away from life, and a good time to "go up the mountains" and seek Him in a deeper way! And indeed there was a lot of prayers put into the camp preparation.
Anyway, there were many breakthroughs, for example, for the hurting. I really experienced the healing of emotional scars/hurts caused by circumstances or people around. With deeper conviction that God is able to heal us.. because He has died on the cross and rose on the third day victoriously. If He can overcome death, how immeasurably more can He heal those who are hurting! (:
Even as we "go down the mountains", may we always choose not to settle for ordinary things. God has plans which will prosper us and not harm us! If we will choose to be led.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
A levels felt like a dream. (Pardon me.)
I've gotta say there was so much more that could be put in but with the limited time plus all the exam adrenaline, I know I did my best. And this was my goal so that I won't spend the rest of my holidays moaning or filled with any regrets. However tempted I am to keep having flashbacks and beat myself up for "not doing THE best" rather than MY best- the typical human reaction- I guess I am going to just move on and continue to give my best in all that I do.
An update on life. Decided to join LEADS and got through the interview. It's a two month intensive leadership training in church. To be very honest, I'm joining with pretty little understanding of what will happen but I guess I felt comfortable making the decision... and there's this expectancy within me to bring much back from it! =D (A feeling which I thought was pretty normal but on a second thought, maybe not!) Can't wait to blog more about it soon. (:
The after-A's feeling. I wanted to spend this week well since the training is going to take up quite a bulk of my time. So far so good. Especially today. Sophia came to my house and we made sushi.. not bad for a first time attempt. Just felt like making so that we can do something for our class gathering. (: And it was so great just spending time with them. Think I'm gonna make that for BFC christmas party. =D I love to cook though it may not taste as fantastic for now. Heh.
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Looyee, you're just one cm away from friday. (:
Sammie prayed for me before my Geog paper. I like the way she viewed exams- like it's an offering of worship to God. After my math paper, I was grumbling within about pathetic question 1. But I paused and thought, what can I say, if You are pleased with this offering of worship?
I thank Him for He looks at my heart and not my results.
Friday, November 06, 2009
Some things which I want to pen down quick before I forget.
The other day.. An idea dropped into my head to gather some friends together for prayer. I hesitated cause it was near to A's but I'm glad I did it. Especially thankful for Rach, Victor and Cheese for doing the word and worship, and everyone who came. We really had a great time! It was more than just preparing our hearts for A levels, but really encouraging one another in our walk with God. Life is really more than just about studies..
Jem asked me about how we set the prayer fast content. And I couldn't quite remember and I didn't really blog it down in details.. Hmm. Which makes me think.. We really need to learn to journal down these minute details in life that matter.
All the best to all for A's! (:
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Camp David Peace Treaty.
Oh yes, I'm about to reach the end. I think the thing some of my friends and I feel is mutual. Especially Sophia. We really supported each other during this two years, spurring each other on. Think I'd miss her a lot. And she made sure I invite her to my wedding next time. Haha.
History is officially my best friend for the past few days. Had mock paper. When I postpone the intl paper last night due to lack of preparation, I thought I could almost float in my bubble of joy. (: I'm glad Ms Chan came to bring conviction in my heart that I've neglected Math again. Alright Math, I'll try to get to know you better. Even though sometimes you're quite weird for a friend. I thought we used to know each other so well.
Lunch with family. Time spent with family has been more regular. (:
1 Cor 15:50,57
I declare to you, brothers, that flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God, nor does the perishable inherit the imperishable.
But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.
This verse really brought comfort to my heart and mind.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
One thing that I'm definitely going to do after A's is go for a food binge! =D But as yet, I can't quite find a friend who is as hungry..
Farewell assembly was nice.. really nicer than I've ever thought. Singing the school hymn for a last time, photos with the class, the really wonderful gifts from teachers. It almost felt like children's day. And I was really encouraged by my teachers' notes. I'm like a notes person i.e. words of affirmation work better than a car key. (I hope so, since I've never received a car key in my life. Heh.) Or rather, I re-read the notes you give to me at least 3 times on the day you give me. And time with exco and class was really great. Love the class video! Haha. (:
Maybe I will marry someone who can cook.. Like get them for a cooking audition or something. Kidding. (:
Thursday, October 08, 2009
I will not be afraid of Math.. I'd bite the Math paper to prove it. (:
Saturday, October 03, 2009
I look back at Block Test 1 and I don't know why I'm laughing nervously within.
"So there I was, still feeling upset about my studies (as though that one lousy attempt should mark me down)..." June 21
If one falls and never picks him/herself up, that is when he/she truly fails. This is a very cliche line that always appear in dramas, but it is very true. I really thank God for picking me up, and for the people around me who never fail to drop a word of encouragement to spur me.
Block Test 2 was a hurdle for the mind and heart, but I made it. I wanted to improve for Prelims, and I did it. Indeed, when I am weak, He makes me strong.
Oh Lord, guard my heart and my mind from the fear and anxiety that try to creep in to steal my peace. I pray this for my brothers and sisters-in-Christ too, that You will put in us the spirit of love, of power, of sound mind and of discipline. May our friends also be encouraged by our lives. In Jesus' name, amen! (:
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
word of life
Romans 8:32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?
This verse really assured me that God is for me. He doesn't withhold good things and I have to trust Him for whatever He is doing. It isn't really like people give pressure to me. But the past week, I have been "fear-struck" (I can't think of a better word) and it just paralyses me when I think about A levels.
And this verse really made me think- of how real the cross is and how real the love of the Father is! (:
Thank You for this love.
Friday, September 25, 2009
It's one of my happy coffee days again.. (:
I really feel proud of myself of cutting down on coffee, chilli and fried food. Like really cutting down. Sometimes I even feel sick looking at the latter.
Back to school kinda days. I guess I don't feel that lousy because I spent my time well before it's time for me to get some momentum, somehow. Especially the dead sea scrolls outing. It was totally awesome! =D Was just looking at some of the photos which Rach took and the i-cant-believe-im-staring-at-it feeling was back. I think it was love at first sight for me and the handwritten bibles-especially the older than old English one. It was so so beautiful. How I wish I can own one. Although the things for us to view was a little limited, I can just take a long time admiring each of the exhibits. (and we can probably bring the ideas to Easter Week next year. haha!) Really wish I could stay there longer. And I think the guide helped us to understand the exhibits a lot better.
So anyway, Sophia and I have been cheering each other to keep the fire going. (: And once in a while we go, "The fire gone so fast." Haha. Got back some of our prelims results. Thus far, I've improved quite a lot but my Math slipped cause I didn't focus much. Heh. But I've been taking it optimistically. The aim I had for this exam was: improve. So I guess there wasn't any unrealistic pressure on myself. And now the final lap- the term they use all the time but I don't see how 'final' it is. Haha.
Each time handing my worries to Him again. (: Thank You for Your faithfulness.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
If you can't find nice books, go find Max Lucado. He can be really witty in what he say and I never get bored of his books. I can't quite put an excerpt here else he might sue me though. )= But I guess I can briefly describe.
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He first described two scenes of a boy building sandcastles and a man in the business world building on his career. Both with a few similarities- making something out of nothing, really determined and hardworking. For the boy, he knew the waves would come, and he claps his hands as he sees the waves draw near. But the man, he hovers over his 'sandcastle' and defiantly says 'it's mine'.
"The ocean need not respond. Both know to whom the sand belongs."
Left on his hands are the remains. Had he listened- not that no one has told him. All things cease to an end someday.
Lucado ends the story with these lines, "Go ahead and build, but build with a child's heart. When the sun sets and the tides take-applaud. Salute the process of life, take your father's hand, and go home."
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We take pride in our studies and work. I do. But everytime we need to remind ourselves that God, our Creator, is the one who enable us to study and to work. I remember during the Block Test 1 period, I kept thinking, "Why do I have to study?" And Joe told me that God gave me my brain cells and made my role now a student (if I may add, and a child of God always).
May we learn how to hold things loosely-- putting excellence in our work and yet committing our plans to God-- so that we will not be building treasures only here on earth. (:
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
And I will go to the altar of God,
My joy and my delight
I will praise You with all of my heart.
Song: Altar of GodYay. Basically, Rach and I have been going crazy over the two 'Glory Revealed' CDs which are really worth buying and the songs are stuck in our heads. I shared with my mum the other day that I can't stop thinking and sometimes it even feels like I'm not really resting when I sleep. She told me to sing some songs and then sleep. That was a good idea which I didn't think about. But typically as human, I did for the first night and not the subsequent. These CDs came timely. Haha. And it's so cool the way they get the lyrics from Bible verses that you probably wouldn't believe could be made into a song. (:
I'm really grateful for the sermon last Sat when Pastor Dan shared about uncertainties in life. After the sermon that day and even the very fact that I read some correlated stuff during QT that morning, I begin to pray daily that God will take away the worries that have been weighing on my heart and I feel so much better! I think prayer is really cool. (: It's more effective than asking a few elephants to come and take away your load. Haha.
One more paper. Honestly, I feel like I'm having a holiday or something because the papers are spaced out quite widely. (good thing)
Friday, September 04, 2009
iris
To my dear dear Iris, I hope you've arrived safely!
Hope that you'd be able to settle down and adapt well, with the new friends and stuff.
And we are all very concerned about you, so do let us know what's going on on your side of the world. (:
And your laughter is irreplaceable. So are you.
I'd really miss the time talking to you about all kinds of stuff under the sky. And how you always buy the $1 coke on the way home.
We'd be keeping you in prayer! Take care!
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My mind is thinking in a ji-pua-ji-pua (fragmented) way so I'm just going to type whatever comes along my mind (with discretion). I've parted from the virtual world for quite a while and I think it's going to continue because (i) the router's down so I have to use my brother's laptop (ii) A levels is not so far away. Kept telling myself to make good use of the time so that I'd be able to enjoy my 7 months or so of break without regret.
I'm having a one week break and three more papers to go. Sent Iris off yesterday. The people who sent her off could almost form a fan club. Haha.
Saw pris tan along the way home. She's taking geog major at FASS. Oh man, I've thought of the real world out there and it's a little daunting. Well, I guess I'd just hold that thought for a while. (:
Good talk with Ben. Like somehow my eyes are opened by God to see my life really as a life filled with grace. And the grace overflows, hopefully to others' lives too.
